I’m an American (proud Oklahoma in fact) living in Australia.  I’m married to an Aussie (Vietnamese as well) and live with her family on the weekends.

I’ll be the first to admit that I assumed the role of whiny Yank early and often in my 3+ years here. During my life I’ve traveled to Mexico a few times and Vietnam as a tourist in each instance. I’d like to share my wisdom of living overseas and how to enjoy it. Before we start, let’s just clear some things up about Australia which I am routinely asked by my friends back home.

• I’ve never once heard an Aussie call their country Down Under. If they do, I think its more used to a non-Australian. You can call it Oz and the people, Aussies (with a z sound).
• Aussies do not say, “throw another shrimp on the barbie”. In fact, they don’t use the word shrimp at all. Prawns. The only time that Aussies say that term is when they are making fun of Americans trying to imitate their accent. However, they do say G’day (infrequently), mate, and bloke.
• They do not drink Fosters. Again, that is a product made for Americans. Aussies do love their beer though and the regional favorite for Melbourne is Victoria Bitter (VB).
• There is more to Australia than the Outback. There is the coastline where everyone lives essentially. There is the bush (snicker snicker) which is the pseudo-forested area before the desert. And then finally, there is the Outback.
• The Aboriginees live mostly on the interior and to the north. I rarely see anyone down in Vic that has Aborginial blood of any discernible level.
• The Crocodile Hunter was not as appreciated here as in the USA. Imagine an Oklahoman embracing all of the redneck stereotypes and broadcasting it to the rest of the world. Though he is respected, Steve-o was highly criticized for lampooning the Queensland spirit.
• Finally, Aussies love their slang and nearly every word that is used with any frequency has a diminutive.

Keep that list handy and stop asking me about shrimps and Foster’s as if its the first time I’ve heard it. And, please don’t quote, “maybe the dingo ate your baby” to me. Let’s get started …

First, as Americans we feel that we have the very best of everything. Big cars, 500 digital channels, fast food, massive stores, good roads, thermo-nuclear bombs. You name it, we’ve got it. It’s ingrained in our national identity that we’re the best, we’re #1. Now the rest of the world already knows how we feel, what we have, and do not need to hear how different (and implied inferior) things are in the new country. For one, American TV is broadcast to the farthest reaches of the globe. They may erroneously think that we all live in the Law & Order universe, but they’ve got a good handle on our modern conveniences.

I fell into this quite early. Every time we did anything, I’d start talking about how different things are in America. You know its bad when you want to tell yourself to shut up, but you just can’t stop talking. When we’d eat, when we’d be stuck in traffic, looking at buying a house. Each time and every time. Its amazing that some bloke name Fitzy hasn’t crowned me yet.

What made it harder to stop my constant comparisons is that Australia and America are so similar. They speak English to start, albeit a unique variety of it. Its not hard to imagine that Victoria is just another US state. Listen to the accents from Boston and then to Texas, its not so far fetched. They have McDonald’s (Macca’s), Burger King (Hungry Jacks), Target, IGA, and even Walmart (Big W).

Had I gone to a country that was drastically different, such as China, I’m sure I’d have been better prepared mentally to embrace everything as a new experience. At least that’s what I keep telling myself.

Second, its easy to get defensive about being American, particularly with our current administration. When non-Americans say “you invaded Iraq, you spread world terrorism, and you tortured captives”, they don’t mean Robert. They mean the United States of America. I was raised to fight, scream, and insult my brother and sisters without remorse, but should anyone else do it, we’d fall upon that poor soul like a pack of angry wolves. It’s similar to my country. Another American criticizing the US feels a lot different than an outsider.

Here’s my advice on that – get over it. We are fairly insulated, isolated, and self-interested as Americans. Little Timmy falling down a well in Virginia will receive non-stop media coverage for 36 hours, while 20,000 Pakistani die in an earthquake is the third story to run. The actions of our country, whether good or bad, create an international legacy and reputation. There are a whole lot more of them, than there are of us.

The good news is this – most places like Americans and America. They just don’t like Bush. I can empathize.

Next, appreciate the differences. This was much easier to do in Vietnam than Australia for me. Probably because of how similar Australia and the USA are. Find the differences and learn to appreciate them. For instance, instead of the ballpark frank, Aussies eat the meat pie. Different, but good. Instead of a white Christmas, they spend it barbecuing in the summer sun at the beach. Different, but good. Instead of baseball, its cricket. Different, but … different.

Here are some tips on making friends in a new country. Its very similar to going on a first date with a woman. Get them talking about themselves. Ask about their country, their people, their culture, etc. Once you’ve allowed them to “introduce” their country and you at least feign appreciation, then you can start talking about the differences.

Specifically for Aussies, they love to gamble (called punting over here). Every Australian that I’ve met that has taken the big trip to the States, always goes to Vegas. Never fails. In fact, the biggest casino in the southern hemisphere is located right in Melbourne (Crown Casino). In addition, they love sport as much as any American particularly footy (Aussie rules) as well as a plethora of other sports, such as cricket, rugby, soccer, swimming, cycling, sailing, lawn bowling, and in general extreme sports. Aussies also love their beer, wine, eating, and travel. Most of them also see England still as the distant mother country and love to outdo them, particularly in cricket (see the Ashes).

For Asians, Confucianism is still the rule. It pervades every aspect of the culture, regardless of the country. Be polite, quietly respectful, and always greet the oldest (and male) person in the room first. If you can, avoid talking with your hands, particularly with older people. Ask about their family cordially, but not intrusively. You can politely refuse food offered the first time, but after the second take it and eat it. Its always polite to bring a small gift, even just a box/jar of sweets. Remember though, chocolate is not as common a flavor in Asian countries as the West, so older Asians will probably prefer something bittersweet, salty, or hard candy.

Being a host and saving face is extremely important. Face is a better way of describing honor in contemporary Asian culture. The fun part is when you drink, a lot of those rules are out the window. You can be loud, boisterous, and obnoxious without much worry of repercussions. This last part for Asia should go without saying – do not break the law, particularly with drugs. If you do, kiss your ass goodbye. It does not matter that you are white, that you are American, or that you are rich.

Finally, listen to what the locals say is the thing to do, to go see. If you’re stuck in a small apartment with bad TV, it doesn’t matter where you are – it’s going to suck.

Good luck on your travels.