I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the advice and lessons I plan on teaching my son as he goes through life.  Things that are universal in their truthfulness and patently useful in their frequency.  Right now he’s just 13 months old, so I’ve got some time to refine this list to make sure that its perfect.  I can already picture myself sitting down with my son on a fishing trip, just like Ward Cleaver.

And this is what I’ll say: [Read Column]

I drive 2 hours to and from Melbourne (big city) and Bendigo (rural town) twice a week.  The trip is 150km of uninterrupted freeway.  I’ve been driving this trip for about two years now.  My wife and kid fall asleep, the iPod is barely audible, and I have the entire stretch of featureless black road to think. After driving this trip more than 100 times for over 200 hours, your mind starts to work in abnormal ways.

And that is how this column was born.

One of the simple truths of life is that the universe is infinite, limitless.  We are not alone.  At least not if you consider the greater expanse of the cosmos.  Statistically, its considered impossible that somewhere, somehow, that intelligent life does not exist.  Sorry for you Creationists.  I mean I’m really sorry for you.

But here on Earth?

Yeah, we’re alone.  In fact, its pretty damn lonely.  The closest we are getting to another race of intelligent beings is if the Japanese sex-bot industry takes off.  And I mean really takes off.  They are leading the race for artificial intelligence.  Believe you me, I’m already investing as many dollars as I can.  “Hello, Yumiko.  Nice maid outfit.”

That got me thinking … if I could select a second species to join homo sapien in our sentience, what would I choose from our world to join the ranks of Mensa? [Read Column]

There are several things about my life that I’m not proud of, that I’d like to keep out of the public eye.  Actions or decisions that were made without careful thought … or perhaps under the evil enchantment of dumbassity.  Such as when I tried to impress the buxom Swiss au pair with my dancing moves while hammered on Coronas, but instead fell on my ass in the middle of the dance floor.

Or the time when I lied to the police about the whereabouts of a stolen movie poster only to have my roommate, who was in the sitting next to me the whole time, suddenly confess that he was the culprit instantly making me guilty of lying to a police officer and aiding and abetting.

But perhaps my most egregious error in judgment is when I committed insurance fraud.  And failed. [Read Column]

RobCast – 4/20/2009

Featured Guest: Johnnie [25:18]

Topics: Thundercats, Exploding Heads, & Danger Sense

Another RobCast.

This time we start with the premise of choosing an 80s cartoon that we thought would be a great movie and, of course, we wandered all over the place with our topic of conversation.  As always my dog (Bingo) and Kirin (son) are playing in the background.  One apology – we’re still refining the sound quality – so Johnnie’s voice is pretty muffled throughout.  Sorry for that.  Not really.

Anyways Enjoy!

Or you can Download the RobCast to listen in your own MP3 player.  Right click the link and select Save Link As.  And of course, this RobCast was created for free the following applications:

RobCast – 4/14/2009

Featured Guest: The Mike [17:55]

Tags: Guns, Pirates, Bears, & Poop

The very first RobCast.

Originally, I had planned to chat with my pal Johnnie, but our schedules were topsy-turvy over Easter.  I called my friend, The Mike, and decided to start recording in mid-conversation just to get my first one under my belt.  Unfortunately, you’re catching our conversation mid-stream AND I had to edit it heavily as Mike was worried that his pro-Nazi speech might be held against him.

Enjoy! [Read Column]